This Valentine’s, people seem to have gotten their knickers in a twist over the Brazilian-waxed, bald-down-there aesthetic (which by the way has been around for a decade or so but is being talked about again because Rachel Johnson – editor of The Lady and sister of London Mayor Boris – wrote about in Vogue this month.)

It’s practically paedophila, they shout. It’s only popular because men spend all their time watching internet porn nowadays, Bidisha warns in the Guardian.

It’s a trend that’s “uncomfortable, time-consuming, irritating, expensive, troubling [and] humiliating” she says. Uncomfortable? Yes. Irritating? Perhaps. Troubling and humiliating? Well not really actually.

Removing all of one’s pubic hair is something that came from the other side of the Atlantic – from Brazil (they leave a ‘landing strip’) where they wear thongs to the beach, and from Hollywood (all off) where it’s quite likely that the barista who served you your morning latte has had a nose job. Over here in Britain, I like to think that we’re quite sensible about both hairdos and sex and we can pop out and get a bikini wax without attracting the kind of man who’s frightened of periods.

Brazilian or Hollywood waxes are something that women do because they like it, or their partners like it, or because it’s a bit of a novelty. You might do it once and decide it’s not for you; you might book yourself in for monthly trims. Either way: it’s up to you. If you want to tack bits of Swarovski crystals to your vulva this Valentine’s (it’s called vajazzling and it actually exists) then fine. I think it’s a little silly but I’m not going to start suggesting your boyfriend is a pervert.

I don’t like being told what to do with my pubic hair; either by Neanderthal men or po-faced women. And anyway it’s quite easy to swing between the two – unruly or uber-groomed – it does grow back you know.