It is well documented how this most sacred of days is to blame for a disproportionately large number of people getting up on the wrong side of the bed, but whether or not that bed will later be filled with a loved one we are surely better off with it than without. Imagine a world without valentines: the day would be like any other, no default subject to discuss, no free-for-all comedy trough from which to drink freely all day.
Whether you are happily in love, not involved, just started dating, or just carrying on your voyage of unashamed coast to coast promiscuity, Saint Valentine, Pope Gelasius and their hoards of bitches have made what could be a very average day into a slightly more interesting one.
It works (like a very ‘good’ relationship or sex toy) both ways. If you are in a relationship you have an extra opportunity, besides the natural I-love-you-I-want-to-do-new-and-exciting-things-with-you reason to go out, enjoy some food and generously acquiesce with each other’s nighttime demands. If however you are not in the convenient position of having someone to share it with, you are immediately initiated into another, on the whole more fun, club. The camaraderie of the anti-Valentine’s brigade is formidable and strangely if, by virtue of being in a relationship, you are not privy to membership then you might actually end up feeling a little green.
Mocking Valentine’s and all its trimmings is an unbeatable feast for the single cynics brought together in a unanimous, if not strictly voluntary, rejection of all things red and heart shaped. The joy this club takes in lampooning at distance (rarely would members launch on those from the other side) is palpable. Couples beware you may be entering a non-Valentine zone.
This is by no means a perfect day, however without it, it would just be another average batch of hours, where small talk would rule and routine prosper. St.Valentine deserves a slap on the back and maybe, regardless of what side of the red line you fall on, a kiss on the cheek too.